


Only Lovers Wear Sunlight

by goofball46



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-15
Updated: 2015-04-19
Packaged: 2018-03-18 01:02:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3550271
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goofball46/pseuds/goofball46
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Flower Shop Tattoo Artist AU. Clarke Griffin is the new tattoo artist in town who buys the tattoo parlor next to Lexa's flower shop.<br/>Follow me on tumblr @ hearteyesreyes.tumblr.com</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. meeting you was fate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> follow me on tumblr @ hearteyesreyes

Lexa hates Saturdays.

Not that they're particularly awful in general, just that she hates the way that they always seem to slip away. She's in the shop from 8 till 6 on Saturdays, but they tend to be her slowest days, especially in the middle of winter. Very little gets done on Saturdays, and she always ends up feeling like she's completely wasted the day. A mouth on her fingers brings her attention back to reality, and she looks down to see a German Shepherd licking her hand in an attempt to get her up. She pulls her fingers from his tongue and rubs his head, making his tail wag happily.

"I'm up, I'm up," she promises, swinging her feet over the side of the bed. He makes a happy woofing sound and follows her into the bathroom, watching patiently as she pulls her hair back into a ponytail and tugs on a sports bra, tank top, and a pair of leggings. She lets him lead her out into the hall, where her other dog is busy chasing his tail. She rolls her eyes and gets them into their collars and leashes. Achilles is the more excited one, and he pulls her forward towards the door while she's still attaching Ajax's leash, and she gives him a warning look, which makes him calm down a little. Once she's ready, they both start tugging at their leashes again, and she exits the house and locks the door behind them before starting her jog, letting the over-excited dogs set the pace. There's a dog park just a few blocks from her house, and she leads them down there, runs about a mile, and then heads back home. It's around 7:30, and she still has to get ready, so she pours out some food for Achilles and Ajax, strips down, and starts her shower. When she's done, she pulls on a white T-shirt and dark skinny jeans, then proceeds to bind her dark curls back into her usual series of braids and twists to keep it out of her face.

"I'll be back soon," she tells her dogs, who whine at her as she heads for the door. "And Costia said she'd come visit you later this morning. Be good while I'm gone." Ajax jumps up onto her legs, and she pets him quickly before leaving and getting onto her bike. She has a van for flower deliveries, but she prefers to bike, especially when it's nice out like this, since it's not too far away. She parks her bike in the back and opens up the store.

It's a slow morning. She gets a call from a woman getting married who wants her to do flowers for the wedding, and they discuss scheduling for a while, but other than that, there are only a few people who trickle in looking for single bouquets, so she can spend most of her time arranging flowers and snipping the stems to the right lengths. Lexa's tying off a bouquet of flowers when her friends enter the room, and she turns around to face them when she's done. Costia's hopped up on the counter, and Anya is leaning against it next her her, her eyes on her phone.

"Hey, guys." Costia hugs her over, and she hugs back. Anya, on the other hand, looks up and gives her a warm smile and a nod of welcome. She's not a hugger. Lexa returns the greeting. "What are you doing here?" Costia grabs a bag from under the counter and pushes it over to Lexa.

"We got you lunch."

"Thanks." Lexa grins and opens it up. "You went to Karla's?" Karla's is Lexa's favorite diner; it's a little out of the way, but the tuna sandwiches there are her favorite.

"Yeah, well, we knew you weren't going to eat if we didn't get you something," Costia teases.

"Honestly, you are way too into these flowers, Lex. Is this healthy?"

"Shut up, Anya," Lexa responds, smiling. "They're pretty. Look." She turns to the back and picked up the bouquet of snow crocuses that she had just finished arranging. "Look at the colors." She raises a hand to push back a strand of hair that had fallen from her braids.

"Okay, you need to come out with us tonight," Anya says. "We're all going out to celebrate midterms being over. It'll be fun."

"Guys..."

"Everyone's expecting you!" Costia adds. "Lincoln's gonna be there... Even Indra's gonna be there, and Indra never comes out with us."

"Okay, fine. But you're driving."

"Don't worry," Anya replies, smirking. "You're such a lightweight; there's no way in hell we'd let you drive."

Lexa pushes her arm. "Go away, Anya."

"Who's next door, by the way? I meant to ask."

"Next door?" Lexa frowns in thought.

"Yeah, there's a new tattoo shop in Mr. Bentley's old spot."

"I didn't notice, honestly. I'll check it out."

"Okay." Costia's phone buzzes in her pocket, and she pulls it out. "Shit. We have to go. But you better be here at 10, okay? We are taking you out and you are not coming up with an excuse today."

"I promise," Lexa says. Costia hops down from the counter and leads Anya out the door. Lexa sinks back into her familiar routine, cutting down the stems and arranging the flowers into various sizes of bouquets. "Anya doesn't understand," she says quietly, "but she'd get it if she were here all day with you."

"You talk to plants?" Lexa's head snaps up to see a pretty girl with long, dark hair staring at her, one eyebrow raised.

"Oh. Um. Yeah, only sometimes."

The girl smirks and walks over to the counter. "I'm Octavia. My friend Clarke opened her shop next door and I need some flowers for her as congratulations."

"Oh, is she the new tattoo artist next door?"

"Yeah. She's really good." Octavia rolls up the left sleeve of her grey Henley, revealing an intricate looping design that curls around her bicep. "She did this for me."

"Wow. I'll have to get something done."

"Yeah. Um, anyways, I need flowers."

"What kind?"

"Um..." Octavia's eyes widen. "I didn't think about that."

Lexa ends up selling her a bouquet of violets and white acacia flowers, which contrast prettily in the large bouquet. Octavia pays for the bouquet and leaves, and Lexa waits about an hour before closing up the shop and going next door. The store is mostly empty, but brightly lit, and a few paintings hang on the walls. They're landscapes, perfect representations of a beach, a forest, and one of a mountain range. They look expertly done. Lexa walks forward to the counter. There's a bell there, a remnant from the old owner's store, and Lexa dings it experimentally.

"Shit," comes a mutter from a back room, then: "Just a minute!"

A few seconds later, a girl comes out from the back room who is easily the most beautiful girl that Lexa's ever seen. She has wavy blonde hair held back with a bandana the exact color of her eyes, which are brilliant sapphire blue. Perfect front teeth sink down into a bright pink lower lip, and her cheeks are a barely-there shade of pink. She's wearing an oversized band T-shirt and a pair of ripped-up jeans.

"Um," Lexa says. "Hi."

The girl grins, and it's a sort-of half smile at first - the left side of her mouth quirks up first before the rest follows. "Hey. I'm Clarke." She thrusts her hand out across the counter. It's a little dirty, and there's an obvious paper cut across the tip her middle finger. She winces and retracts it, wiping it on her jeans. "Sorry that I'm a mess. Moving - you know how it is. And when I got here, this place was kinda disgusting, so I've been cleaning most of the morning."

"Um, it's fine. And this place has basically been abandoned since... well, just about since I moved here," Lexa says, smiling. She holds up her hands to display the dirt caked under her nails. "I'm the florist from next door. And I'm no stranger to dirt."

Clarke grins again. "I don't have my tattooing stuff set up yet, if that's what you're looking for. I should be ready by tomorrow if you want to swing by then?"

"Oh, um, I'm not here for a tattoo."

Clarke cocks her head.

"I just... There was this girl Octavia over at the shop earlier, and she told me that you moved in and I figured I'd come over and kinda... I don't know, welcome you." She smiles, and Lexa can't help but return it.

"That's sweet of you. I appreciate it. And yeah, Octavia's a friend of mine. The flowers are beautiful. I'm planning on keeping them in a vase up on the counter. Brighten up the room."

Lexa's smile spreads; she takes pride in her arrangements. "These paintings are amazing." Clarke's cheeks flush a little darker red.

"Thanks. I like to paint in my free time, but with moving and everything, I haven't had much time." She walks around the painting, running her fingers lightly over the sand of the beach landscape. "This is Maine..." Her fingers drift to the forest. "Washington state..." The mountain. "Alaska..."

"You move around a lot?"

"I used to."

Clarke turns to Lexa, seemingly shaking herself out of a reverie. "I'm afraid I won't be great company today. Bellamy promised to help me unpack my stuff, but he cancelled on me at the last minute, so I'm pretty busy."

"I could help you unpack," Lexa offers, then pauses. "I mean, if you want."

"Really?" Clarke's eyes light up, and Lexa nods. "You're a lifesaver, Flower Girl. I'd be really grateful. But... are you sure you don't need to be back at the shop?"

Lexa shakes her head. "It's no big deal. It's a slow day today anyways. Besides a few of my friends and that girl Octavia, I haven't seen anyone today. This would be a welcome change." Clarke smiles. "Oh, and my name is Lexa, by the way."

"Hm?"

"You called me Flower Girl earlier. It's Lexa."

"Well, then, come help me unpack, Lexa."

Lexa decides right then that she likes the way Clarke says her name - the way the L slips off the other girl's lips and the way her throat trips harshly over the X. Who would've thought that a name could sound this beautiful?

Clarke leads her to the back room. The floor is covered with boxes in varying stages of the moving process - one box is completely empty and overturned, another is half-full of a few binders (the rest of which have found a home on the single piece of furniture in the room, a large wooden bookshelf in the corner of the room), and a third, labeled simply "DAD" in what must be the neatest handwriting Lexa has ever seen, is still taped shut.

"So I'm trying to sort between front room and back room," Clarke explains. "The boxes over here are for out front, and the ones over here belong in the back." As Clarke gestures around the room, Lexa starts to see a pattern in the way she has the books laid out. The ones that are sealed shut are the ones with placement that is obvious by the labels, since Clarke didn't have to open them to place them - DAD, ART, and SKETCHES are all unopened front-room-boxes, while the ones labeled NEEDLES, DESIGNS, and FOR THE COUNTER are all unopened boxes in the back room section. All of the boxes are labeled in tight, almost computer-neat handwriting that makes the room smell like a mixture of Sharpie marker, cardboard, and Febreeze. "Do you want to just take these out to the front?" Clarke asks. She taps one of the boxes with a hand. "You can start a pile of boxes out there and then we can really unpack them later."

"Sure." Lexa grabs the NEEDLES box and stacks it on top of the FOR THE COUNTER box, then lifts them up. The boxes are surprisingly heavy, and she can feel her arm muscles flexing with the weight. "Do you just want them on the counter, or should I put them on the floor next to the counter?" Clarke's eyes flick to Lexa's arms before meeting her eyes.

"Um... You can just put them on the floor, I guess."

"Okay, sure." Lexa takes them out into the front room, then comes back for more boxes. At one point, Clarke clicks on her phone and starts some music. It's only when Lexa checks her phone that she realizes how late it's gotten. "Clarke?" she says. "I've got to check out. I need to take care of some things at the shop."

"Of course," Clarke says, putting down the painting she was in the process of hanging. "Thank you so much for doing this. Honestly, you didn't have to."

Lexa smiles. "Anytime."


	2. with a little help from my friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke gets Lexa's help again.  
> Also: backstory time.

Clarke's still getting used to finding her way around, and she ends up calling Octavia twice on her way to the grocery store on Sunday just to make sure she's going the right way. She's just thankful to know someone who knows the area, even if Octavia teases her endlessly about it. ( _"And you're supposed to be the smart one!" "Shut up, O." "I'm just saying."_ ) She needs to pick up some actual food - she's staying with Raven and Octavia until she actually gets established enough to get her own place, and even though it's her turn, Raven isn't always the most reliable when it comes to grocery shopping. An acne-spotted kid welcomes her to the store in a monotone, and she looks at the list she's prepared, taking off for the dairy isle first.

She's about halfway through her shopping when she sees the back of a girl's head with brown curls falling out of a series of braids which - while they were neater yesterday - are unmistakable.

"Lexa?"

The girl's head whips around, one hand flying up to adjust the large sunglasses she's wearing. "Oh, um, hey." Her voice is hoarse, and her other hand grabs at her forehead.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah. Hungover." Lexa rakes a hand back through her curls, pulling her braids even looser. Clarke can't resist a smile.

"Yeah?"

She makes a small grunting noise of confirmation, and Clarke's smile widens. "Jesus, how much did you drink?"

"Too much."

"And what exactly is too much?"

Lexa winces under her sunglasses. "Two beers?"

Clarke can't resist a laugh at that. "You're kidding."

"Look, I know I'm a lightweight-"

"Being a lightweight is one thing; getting this hungover off of two beers is entirely another." Clarke's grin has spread completely across her face now, and she swears that Lexa's cheeks are turning redder.

"You can tease me all you want, just do it quietly," she says, groaning and rubbing her forehead. "And two beers is a lot for me." Lexa pushes her sunglasses up into her hair, wincing at the light, and Clarke resists a smirk at how much she's blushing. She nods at Clarke's shopping cart. "What are you getting?"

"I'm trying to find pasta?" Clarke tucks a strand of blonde hair behind her ear and brandishes her list in her other hand like a flag. "This store has literally the _worst_ layout that I've ever seen."

"Ugh, I understand." Lexa smiles. "When I first moved here, I would spend so much time on my shopping because I had no clue where anything was. Here, let me see what's left on your list."

Clarke hands it over, and Lexa squints to read it. "Um, okay. So pasta is in aisle 18, and so is soda. Actually..." She looks at her basket, then back up at Clarke. "Do you want me to just take you around? It's probably easier than you trying to remember all of this."

"Sure. Thank you so much!"

Lexa waves her off. "Don't mention it." She leads Clarke around the store, the two filling the silence with small talk. At one point, she pulls out the small bands tying back her braids and lets her hair fall free. Clarke pauses mid-sentence, distracted by the movement of Lexa's hair, before finishing what she was saying.

"So why did you choose to move here?" Lexa asks.

"Um... Well, my friend Octavia was the one who moved down her first. She's the one who was buying flowers on Saturday? Yeah, so she moved down here because she wanted to get out of our hometown, and she didn't know where she wanted to move, because neither she nor Bellamy really have any ties anywhere. Their parents are both gone, and it's always just been the two of them, but then our friend Raven got accepted to the local university for engineering in an accelerated program, and so in her junior year, she moved out to an apartment and invited Octavia down to split the cost. As for me, I went to the local university back in my hometown until a few months ago, when..." Clark swallows hard and looks down at her scuffed boots. "When some stuff happened. And I wanted to move away from home, so Raven offered me a place in her apartment, so I applied to the local university here. She's going back for her masters now and since I moved in and three of us are all paying rent, we could afford this loft out on 2nd Street, so that's where we are. Octavia lives with us mostly, but Bellamy's got this place closer to the bar where O works, and it's a little smaller, but Octavia stays there sometimes." Lexa frowns a little bit through Clarke's answer, and she realizes that Lexa doesn't know who Bellamy is. "Oh, sorry. Um, Bellamy is Octavia's older brother. He's been one of my best friends since kindergarten."

A muscle in Lexa's jaw twitches slightly, and Clarke suddenly finds herself staring at Lexa's jawline, admiring the smooth skin and the way that the light hits it. She has to internally shake herself to pull her eyes back up to Lexa's.

"What about you? What's your story?"

"Oh." Lexa smiles self-consciously, ducking her head. Her curls tumble down, obscuring her face, and she raises a hand to push it back away from her face. Clarke's eyes track the movement of the curls, the aqueous way that they slip through her fingers and bounce as she walks. "I don't have a particularly interesting story. My mother left when I was very young, and my father..." Her jaw clenches and her eyes harden. "My father's an asshole. I got out of there as soon as possible. I came here because I had nowhere else to go and because my closest friend Costia suggested it; her grandmother lived in the area, and when her family moved to come take care of her, Costia and I thought we wouldn't see each other again. But when I left home, I realized it was my chance, and I took it. Fortunately, it's been working out for me so far, but we'll see."

"Who's Costia?"

Lexa starts walking towards the cereal aisle, waiting before responding. "She's... I mean, she's been my lifeline. I've known her since fifth grade, and she's helped me through... all the shit with my dad." She smiles. "She's sweet. You'd really like her, I think."

Clarke wants to ask about Lexa's father, but also knows it's not her place to pry. Something inside her twists at the thought of Lexa being trapped in a house with someone who made her have this sort of reaction at the thought of him. It makes her shudder.

"What about your other friends?"

"I don't have too many. There's Anya; I met her my freshman year of high school. And there's Lincoln and Indra, who I got to know from sports. We were all on the high school athletic teams together. They're good people; they all are, but Costia and I have been together forever, and she'll always be my best friend. What about you?"

"Oh, man. I mean, Finn's probably my closest friend that I haven't mentioned. He's still at my old university right now back home, but he graduates at the end of spring, and he's thinking about moving down here afterwards. The problem is that I just transferred mid-semester, so I've been trying to get into the whole social scene here, and I kinda need money, which is why I'm opening the tattoo parlor. I figure it's a good way to use some of my art skills to pick up some money so that I can apply to a more rigorous medical program. But I haven't really met anyone, so most of my friends are all from high school."

Clarke puts the last item in her cart (eggs, because Bellamy keeps stealing all of theirs to make breakfast food when he comes over) and pushes it towards the check-out. "I guess I should get going then. And you should get back to your own shopping. I'm sorry to take up all your time, but I have to say, you're a total lifesaver."

Lexa grins. "If you ever need anything, you know where to find me."

"See ya around, Lexa."

Lexa nods and heads back into the labyrinthine aisles of the store, pulling her sunglasses back down, and Clarke checks out without a problem. She loads the groceries up in her car and winds up on a highway that she definitely doesn't remember from her trip down before finally giving in and calling Octavia.

"Hey, Princess."

"Don't say anything but I'm in the middle of some highway and have no fucking clue how to get home and you better not fucking laugh, Octavia."

Octavia's familiar laugh sounds in her ear and Clarke lets out a low growling noise. "Okay, okay, calm down. Jesus, I can't believe you didn't get lost inside the fricking store."

Clarke's cheeks burn red as she changes lanes to pass a truck.

"Oh my God."

"O-"

Octavia's laugh is practically a cackle. "You're joking."

"Okay, so yes, _maybe_ I got some help. But that store has the _worst_ layout I've ever seen - even Lexa agreed with me!" Clarke can tell she's made a mistake the second Lexa's name is out of her mouth.

"Who's _Lexa_?"

"She's just... this girl. I don't know. Maybe my friend? Kinda?"

"How'd you meet her?"

"This is _not the point, Octavia."_

"Okay, okay. Um, where are you?"

"I'm turning off the highway towards a CVS like twenty minutes from the grocery store."

"Did you turn left or right coming out of the parking lot?"

"Left."

"Okay, you need to turn around. Don't get back on the highway."

Somehow Octavia manages to get her pointed the right way, although not without a few snarky comments about calling _Lexa_ for help. Clarke's not sure why, but she has the exact same feeling she had when she was sixteen and her mom walked in on her making out with Finn for the first time. Octavia manages to navigate Clarke back to the apartment, and Clarke brings in the groceries. The loft is empty, and she frowns as she puts the grocery bags on the counter in front of the fridge.

"Octavia?" she calls out, pulling off her sweater and tugging the hem of her tank top back down. She folds the sweater and places it on the counter as she starts walking. "Raven?"

There's a clanking noise and a stream of swear words before Raven emerges from the guest-room-turned-workshop, dirt streaked across her clothing and face. She's got her thumb pressed to her mouth, but Clarke's kind of used to seeing her with any number of injuries and knows that that's just how it is.

"I fucking burned my fucking thumb with the fucking welding iron." Raven scowls as she flicks on the sink and runs cold water over her thumb. She wipes it off on her jeans and turns to face Clarke. "Shit, was it my turn to go grocery shopping?" Clarke nods. "I'm sorry, Griff. You know I would have done it if I remembered." Raven grabs her wallet off of the counter. "How much do I owe you?"

"Don't be ridiculous. It'll just be your turn next week. Don't worry about it."

Raven's shoulders relax a little. "Thanks."

"Is Octavia here?"

"No, she's left for Bellamy's like five minutes ago."

"Gotcha."

"But not before telling me to interrogate you. Apparently you've been making friends without telling us?" Raven offers an amused smirk and Clarke buries her face in her hands with a groaned _ohmygod_. "So? Spill!" Raven swipes a hand across her forehead to push back a strand of hair that's pulled lose from her ponytail, ultimately leaving a streak of grease in its place.

"She's no one really. I mean, she came over on Saturday to help me move in and then I saw her again today at the grocery store. She's nice, and I like her, but that's it. That's the whole story."

"Okay, but like... As much as I love you, Griff, you don't exactly make friends easily. I mean, think about school so far. After you transferred, did you keep in touch with anyone? And you didn't exactly replace them. At all. Not that you need to forget them or anything, but it's important that you make new friends. I know that Abby's been worried about you, and she's not the only one. O and I are just glad that you're actually getting out on the social scene outside of hanging with us."

"It's not like I don't do my fair share of partying." Raven laughs at that.

"Trust me, Griff; that's not what I'm saying here. I've seen you with tequila, and it's actually pretty damn impressive. Like, if I could drink like you can..." She shakes her head in admiration. "Anyways, I guess I'm saying that it's really a good thing that you're making friends now. We're just curious."

Clarke nods. "So what exactly have _you_ been up to? You just disappear into the workshop for hours and only resurface to get food or to grab your cell phone. What's up?"

Raven grins. "You'll find out soon enough. I've been working with Abby and Jasper and Monty, which is why I'm always on the phone. And that is your only hint."

"My mom plus two kids from your college?"

"Yeah. Jasper's in my more hardcore engineering courses and Monty's in Chem."

"Medical, engineering, and chemistry?"

"Yep." Clarke frowns in thought, and Raven pushes her shoulder. "Hey, you don't get to try to figure it out, okay? Don't ruin the surprise." Clarke laughs a little at her seriousness. "And don't you dare try to ask your mom because we've already talked about it and she promised she wouldn't tell."

"Fine." Clarke raises her hands in surrender. "Don't tell me. I've gotta study anyways. I've got a big bio test tomorrow and I haven't been studying for it as much as I should because I'm opening the store."

"Good luck."

Clarke smiles and Raven heads back into her workshop. Clarke goes down the hall to the room that she shares with Raven and Octavia and opens her book. Her mind wanders easily, though, which is unusual for her, and she finds herself getting out her well-used set of drawing pens and her sketchbook. She's not sure what she wants to draw, but at least she can get the urge to sketch out of her system. She begins with a soft curve, barely thinking about what she's drawing until she realizes that her drawing, originally a generic girl, had taken on Lexa's mouth and nose and bone structure. She gives in to it, drawing in Lexa's curls and eyes and then a rough outline of the shoulders of the oversized sweater that Lexa had been wearing in the grocery store. She traces over her final pencil marks in pen before shutting her sketchbook and turning back to her book.

She studies for a few hours until Octavia comes home, at which point she gives up on her books to head back out into the main room. Octavia and Bellamy are both there, and Raven's emerged from her workshop. She flops down on the couch next to Bellamy.

"So who's this new guy you've been talking to, O?"

Clarke's eyebrows raise at Bellamy's words. "There's a new guy?"

Octavia punches her brother in the shoulder. "You weren't supposed to tell anyone, you asshole!"

"Oh, please," Raven scoffs. "It's not like we weren't going to find out. We do live with you."

"Whatever," Octavia says, rolling her eyes. "There's nothing to tell, anyways. I met him at the bar Saturday night and we started talking. He's nice. That's _all_."

"It doesn't sound like that's all," Clarke teases.

"Shut up, Princess." She throws a pillow at Clarke across Bellamy and Clarke throws it back at her. After prying for more details and receiving none, Bellamy, Raven, and Clarke give up on trying to get answers out of her and put on a movie. They fall asleep on the couch, and when Clarke wakes up in the morning to the light streaming in through the window behind them, she thinks she may have finally found where she belongs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> follow me @ hearteyesreyes.tumblr.com


	3. you spend your days running from nightmares

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> light trigger warning for indications of past abuse (bc lexa's dad was shitty)  
> follow me on tumblr @ hearteyesreyes

Costia has always been a fan of running before the sun rose. In the spring especially, as the winter winds down, when it isn't quite warm enough to qualify as spring weather, but not cold enough to be classified as winter weather, she likes to shrug on a loose sweatshirt (which she's pretty sure is actually Lexa's from high school) over a T-shirt and go out at ridiculous hours of the morning. Lexa has always teased her for it, but Costia always protested that it's better when no one's around. So when she passes Lexa's house, she's not expecting to hear any noises from within.

Except that she does.

Lexa's window is open, and since it's dead quiet in the street, Costia can make out the sound of crying coming from inside. Lexa's not a crier. Costia retrieves a key from under a rock out front and lets herself in.

Lexa's in bed, her sheets twisted around her body. She's clutching them with white knuckles, and the moonlight from her window is making her skin shine, a sheen of sweat coating her face. Tears are slipping down her cheeks, and she's muttering fervently under her breath.

Costia's immediately taken back to high school, when Lexa would sleep over on the nights when her dad was particularly bad. Nightmares had plagued her back then, and clearly still affected her.

"Lexa." Costia sits on the bed next to her, placing a hand on her shoulder. "Lexa, wake up." Lexa moans quietly, and Costia shakes her shoulder lightly. "Lex, come on. Wake up."

She starts murmuring things again, her voice desperate. Costia can't hear it all, but she makes out some phrases, including "don't hurt her," and her heart wrenches in sympathy.

"Lexa, wake up." Lexa's eyes suddenly fly open, and she pulls away from Costia, her breathing hard and fast. "It's just me. It's Costia. You're okay. You're okay." Costia's fingers are cold against Lexa's face as she moves a strand of Lexa's hair behind her ear from where it was stuck to her face with sweat. Her hand continues its path, gently stroking her hair. "You're okay, Lexa. It's just me. It's just Costia." Lexa's eyes finally seem to register her friend, and her breathing slows to a more normal rate. She moves closer to Costia, but her muscles remain tense. "You're okay," Costia says, and Lexa leans into her. They sit in silence for a while, Lexa's breathing filling the empty space until she finally says something.

"Fuck."

Lexa doesn't really swear much ever, and the simple curse makes Costia not want to let go of her hold on the other girl. "Have you been having nightmares again?" Costia asks. Her voice is quiet.

"No," Lexa answers. "Just tonight."

"Okay." Costia moves further into the bed, and Lexa shifts to allow it. Costia's smaller than Lexa is, but she still pulls Lexa into her, cradling her body with her own. Her fingers still stroke back Lexa's hair, something she knows from experience is calming for Lexa. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Lexa pauses, then shakes her head. One of her hands grabs Costia's free one and their fingers tangle together.

"Okay." Costia doesn’t push; she knows that Lexa will tell her when she’s ready to.

More silence. "Can you..." Lexa's voice shakes and she restarts. "Can you just talk to me?"

Costia knows what she means; whenever Lexa had nightmares in high school, Costia would talk to her, anything to get her mind off of it. "Sure." She pauses. "Did you know Lincoln has a new girlfriend? He met her on Saturday night when we were all out at that bar. On Sunday, Anya and Indra and I went out for lunch - you were out grocery shopping I think - and we went out for lunch and we ran into them. It was just the two of them, and Lincoln introduced us. She's pretty. And nice, too. I think she'll be good for Lincoln. They seem really happy together." Costia continues on about Lincoln and his girlfriend until she feels Lexa begin to relax in her arms.

"Can you stay with me tonight?"

"Yeah, of course." She knows Lexa won't sleep, not after a nightmare, but she nods anyways. "Can I get changed?"

Lexa nods against her and she slips out of bed, stripping off the sweatshirt and her leggings and dropping them in a pile on top of her sneakers in favor of an over-sized T-shirt from Lexa's dresser. She slides back into bed next to Lexa, letting the taller girl take the position of the big spoon.

"You're going to be okay, Lexa," she whispers, but it's too quiet for Lexa to hear, even being pressed tightly against Costia's body like she is.

 

Lexa’s missing when Costia wakes up, so Costia stretches her arms out and gets out of bed. A glance at the clock tells her that it’s only 6:30. She pads out into the kitchen, yawning as she goes. Lexa’s there, making scrambled eggs in the same tank top and shorts that she went to bed in. She doesn’t turn at the sound of Costia’s feet on her floor; doesn’t say anything until she splits the eggs between two plates and sits down at the kitchen table next to her.

“Good morning.”

Costia’s eyes trace over Lexa’s face, the darkened skin under her eyes, the way her eyes are still slightly too alert for what time it is. “Morning,” she responds. “How are you?”

“Fine,” Lexa responds, but it’s too little and too quick, and regardless of how she said it, they both know it’s a lie anyway.

“When did you start having nightmares again?”

Lexa doesn’t respond at first, and Costia’s about to say something when she finally answers. “It was just last night. It’s been a while.”

“Okay.” They eat silently for a while, before Costia asks another question. “Was there anything that… prompted it?”

Lexa stops chewing for a half-second, her eyes widening almost imperceptibly before slipping back into her mask of indifference. “No.”

“Lex…” Lexa’s eyes warn her to drop the subject, and Costia nods.

“I have to get ready.” Lexa pushes away from the table, dropping her fork onto her plate. “Would you mind walking Ajax and Achilles for me?”

“Sure. I’ll walk them before I head out to school. My first class isn’t until 10:30.”

"Thanks."

Lexa disappears into her bedroom and Costia slumps back in her chair. She knows that Lexa will open up about it soon; she always shuts down right after something happens but eventually tells Costia everything. In the meantime though, it's killing Costia to see her best friend like this. Ajax jumps up on Costia's lap, and she ruffles his fur fondly. He always liked her more than Achilles did. The other dog watches her from his food bowl, eyeing her suspiciously.

She hears the water start in the other room, and finishes her breakfast. The water shuts off, and she goes to put the plate and fork in the dishwasher. She waits a few minutes more before determining that she's given Lexa enough time to get dressed.

“Lexa?”

Costia pokes her head in the door to the bedroom, and Lexa whips around, her hair falling out of the braids she was crafting, her eyes widening in surprise.

“Shit.” She relaxes when she realizes who it is, refocusing on the hair that now has to be re-braided. She's wearing a white tank top and floral skirt.

“Here.” Costia crawls across the bed to settle down behind Lexa and slips her fingers through Lexa’s hair. “Let me.” Lexa manages a small smile and leans back into her touch. Costia makes a soft humming noise. “I love your hair. I always have. It's so pretty.” Her hands are steady from all of the suturing practice she’s had from medical school, and they weave the strands of Lexa’s hair with a clinical level of precision.

Lexa laughs, the noise making Costia smile. Costia’s always been fairly impressed and more than a little concerned by Lexa’s ability to hide her feelings. “It’s annoying as hell is what it is.”

Costia rolls her eyes. “Do you have a hair tie?” Lexa passes one up to her. “Thanks.” She finishes tying back Lexa’s hair and moves to look at her straight on. It's not quite the way that Lexa usually wears it, but it’s pretty, and Costia smiles at her handiwork.

“Thanks, Cos.”

“Of course. Now you should probably get to work, right?” She gives Lexa a sympathetic look. “It’s a good thing you did well on all those placement tests freshman year. I don't know how you would've balanced both the shop and a full courseload.”

Lexa shrugs. “I would've been fine. The real problem’s going to come when I have to find an internship.”

They dance around the fact that Lexa has no money to fall back on. When she went to college, her father refused to pay a dime, but she was lucky enough to earn a full scholarship. The small apartment she lives in is entirely the product of what money she could scrape together from her high school job at the local amusement park, figuring that she can use the apartment after college, and so it would be a waste to pay room and board instead of just getting a place herself. Every cent she earns beyond rent goes to pay for the shop, and the saving grace of it all is that Lexa can test well, and managed to practically cut her course load in half from how she scored on those placement tests, allowing her to basically skip a year of college. Her time is split between school and the shop, and while it may annoy her friends that she’s barely ever available, she needs to do well.

Costia, however, has never had that problem. Her mother, some fancy doctor, pays all of her medical school bills in full. She’s offered more than once to give Lexa money, but Lexa always refuses.

“Do you have one lined up?” Costia asks.

“There’s a non-profit dedicated to international environmental preservation that’s basically already offered me an internship. But that’s not what I really want to do…”

Lexa doesn't need to explain. Costia’s known since they were 15 that Lexa wants to be a diplomat. This hasn't changed so far, except that it’s gotten more specific: Peacekeeping and Conflict Resolution is Lexa's favorite course.

Sometimes Costia envies Lexa. Costia’s been told since she could speak that she should be a doctor, like her mother, and she never questioned it. Now that it's becoming more present than future though, Costia sometimes doubts that it's exactly what she wants to do. When her eyes slip down to Lexa’s mouth, she has to remind herself that there are lots of things she wants to do but can't.

Lexa goes out into the kitchen, where Ajax and Achilles attack her, jumping up at her legs. She pets them each before turning to Costia. "Thank you so much. For everything."

"Always."

Lexa heads out, grabbing her bike and pedaling down to the shop. The lights are already on in Clarke’s tattoo parlor, and after casting a glance at her watch, she chains her bike up near the shop’s back door and heads into the blonde’s shop.

Clarke’s talking with a tall, dark-haired boy when Lexa walks in, but stops to grin at her when she enters. “Hey, Lexa!”

“Hi, Clarke.” The boy gives Clarke a look, and she shoves his shoulder. His mouth quirks up into a smile at the action.

“What's up?” Clarke asks, directing her attention at Lexa and ignoring her friend.

“Um, I just got this tattoo a few weeks ago.” Lexa holds out her arm to display the ink on her upper arm. “Before you moved in. And I was just wondering if you could do a quick touch up?” Her last sentence is more of a question than a statement.

“Of course.” Clarke gestures to a chair, and Lexa sits down in it. “Just give me a second.”

She goes back to talk to the dark-haired boy, and Lexa takes the opportunity to look around the room. The work that Clarke’s managed to do in just one day is pretty impressive. She’s gotten the place looking almost complete. More of her paintings are hung up around the room, and Lexa evaluates them silently. Just as before, she’s stunned by Clarke’s talent – her paintings are photorealistic. Most are landscapes, except for two. One portrays a man, slender and blonde, reading a book. The other is a group of people – a boy with longish brown hair, a girl who Lexa recognizes as the girl who came into the flower shop on Saturday, a girl with a red jacket and dark hair, and the boy Clarke’s talking to now. They all have their arms around each other, their faces frozen mid-laugh.

Clarke laughs loudly at something the boy says, and Lexa’s jaw clenches. “Don't you have a class to go to or something, Bell?”

“Not till ten-thirty. But I did promise to take O to class, so I should get going.”

“See ya.” The boy leaves, and Clarke comes over to sit next to her. “I’m sorry about that. That's my friend, Bellamy. He’s… He can be annoying, but he’s one of my best friends.” Lexa’s not sure why, but she's glad the boy left. “Okay, so. Your tattoo.”

Lexa nods. “Yeah. The linework just needs a little touching up.” Clarke’s fingers carefully trace the outline of Lexa’s tattoo, and she shivers at the touch.

“It's pretty,” Clarke comments idly. “This shouldn't take too long.” She rests her palm against Lexa’s forearm as she leans back to grab some supplies, and it's warm against Lexa’s skin. Clarke cleans the area and starts working on the tattoo. Her hand is steady, and Lexa can't help but be reminded of the way Costia’s hands move. Both girls have the same sort of accuracy and confidence with the movements. Clarke’s hand doesn't move from Lexa’s upper arm, and Lexa watches the way Clarke’s bright blue eyes narrow in concentration, her teeth sinking down into her lower lip as she focuses. Lexa counts the freckles dusting Clarke’s cheek, watches the way her tongue pokes out to lick her lips before replacing it with her teeth again.

“Okay, all done!” Clarke sits back and cleans the area again. “And hey, if you ever want another tattoo, you know where to find me. And if you need anything, you have my number.” She does. Clarke gave her her personal cell number when they met at the grocery store.

“Sure.”

“Is something wrong?”

Clarke's question catches her by surprise, and Lexa frowns at her. “No, why?”

“No reason. Just…” She shrugs, tucking her hair behind her ear. “I don't know, I kinda got the vibe that something was off. Never mind.”

“Okay.” Lexa gets up and is at the door when she turns back. “Hey, Clarke?”

“Yeah?”

Lexa considers her words for a moment before answering. “Thanks for asking.”


	4. only to find that the nightmares are reality

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tw for mentions of abuse  
> follow me on tumblr @ hearteyesreyes

Octavia’s wiping down tables when Clarke comes in, and she hands Clarke a glass of Monty’s newest brew. Monty, one of Raven’s friends from a chemistry class of hers, was hired a few months ago upon the discovery that he really knew his way around alcohol. Raven and Bellamy enter a few minutes later, and after a few drinks, they’re all laughing at something Raven said. It's too early for a crowd, but too late for the lunch rush, and the four of them are the only ones in the bar aside from a few people who sit silently while nursing drinks that Octavia’s pretty sure they’ve been sipping from slowly for about an hour now.

“So, Clarke, how was day one of the parlor being open?”

There’s a loud cheer from her friends, and Clarke grins. “It's going well, but I’ve still got a ton to do.”

“Are you kidding?” Bellamy raises his eyebrows. “I was in there this morning and it looked pretty finished to me.”

Clarke shakes her head. “You haven't seen the back room.” Bellamy rolls his eyes; knowing Clarke, the back room is probably nearly spotless. She’s just too much of a perfectionist to let anything slide.

“Have you had any customers yet?” Octavia asks.

“Yeah.” Clarke’s smile gets bigger.

“Anyone we know?”

“You’ve heard me talk about Lexa, right?”

“Only nonstop since Saturday,” Raven teases.

“Yeah, well, she came in to get her tattoo touched up. She was so nice, too. Bell was there distracting me, and she didn’t even say anything about it.”

“Wait, _that_ was Lexa?” Bellamy makes a low whistling noise. “Damn, Princess, you didn't say she was hot.”

“I didn't think it was relevant,” Clarke says, but she’s definitely blushing.

“Hot Tattooed Florist Lexa,” Octavia muses, smirking. “Damn, Clarke. I’ve been here for like, twice as long as you, and somehow you find the most interesting people.”

Clarke downs the rest of her glass. “Oh, you’re one to talk. Why haven't we met your boyfriend yet?”

“You better watch it or I’m cutting you off,” Octavia threatens, eyeing Clarke’s empty glass. Clarke nudges it towards her as a hint.

“Yeah,” Raven chimes in. “Anything new happening with… what was his name? Lincoln?”

Octavia glares at Raven, who grins back at her. “Firstly, he’s not my boyfriend.”

“Sure.” Bellamy made a noise somewhere between a laugh and an incredulous snort.

“Bell!”

“I didn't say anything!” He holds up his hands in surrender, and Octavia rolls her eyes.

“And I was _going_ to say that you might get to meet him tonight, but I’m just about ready to kick you all out.”

“Wait, he’s coming here?”

“Yeah.” Octavia nods, finally refilling Clarke’s glass. “He wanted to meet my friends.” Another person comes in and sits at the bar, and Octavia moves to take care of him. There's a noise as the door to the bar opens, and the friends turn to see a tall man with broad shoulders enter. His face lights up when he sees Octavia.

“Lincoln?”

Clarke’s voice turns his head. “Oh, hey, Clarke!”

“That’s Lincoln?” Raven sounds impressed. “Wait, Clarke, you know Lincoln?”

“I didn't realize that he was _Lincoln_ Lincoln,” Clarke says. “He’s in my art class. He’s… an _amazing_ sketch artist. How did you meet-”

“Lincoln!” Octavia finishes up with the other man and runs over to him, hugging him over the bar.

“Just friends my ass,” Raven mutters. She and Bellamy have to resort to coughing wildly to cover up their laughter.

“You’re early,” Octavia remarks.

“I wanted to see you.” Octavia’s grin is radiant. Lincoln turns to Bellamy and shakes his hand. “You must be her brother.”

“Yeah.” Bellamy’s mouth is twisted down into a scowl.

“I’m Lincoln Forrest.” They release hands, and Lincoln turns back to Octavia. “How’s the bar?”

She rolls her eyes. “Same as usual. How’s your job?”

Lincoln smiles. “It’s exciting. I’m being sent out in a few months.”

“What do you do, Lincoln?” He turns to Raven.

“I work for a nonprofit. We build homeless shelters in impoverished areas and work to improve the quality of life in poor neighborhoods.”

“Damn,” Raven remarks, her eyebrows shooting up. “That’s pretty cool.”

“Oh, uh, yeah, Lincoln, this is Raven. And Bellamy, obviously, and Clarke.” Octavia flushes red slightly, uncharacteristically awkward upon the realization that she hadn’t introduced the rest of the group yet.

“So what changed your mind about introducing him to us?” Raven asks, turning back to Octavia.

“I wasn’t going to,” Octavia admits. “But we met his friends, Anya and… Costa?”

“Costia,” Lincoln corrects, and she nods.

“Right, Costia. Anyways, we ran into them on Sunday and we had lunch together, and then Lincoln mentioned that he hadn’t met my friends, and I asked if he wanted to, and… well, here we are.”

“Took you long enough,” Clarke teases. She resists a comment about how she usually meets Octavia’s partners the day after Octavia herself when they come down to the kitchen at six in the morning to grab food in various stages of undress.

“Don’t even, Clarke Griffin. Or do I need to bring up _Lexa_ again?” Clarke turns a bright shade of red and Octavia smirks in a smug sort of victory. “Oh, I have something to tell you and Raven, by the way. And Bell, I was going to tell you too. Lincoln’s going to South America in a few months…” She twists her fingers together nervously. “And… I’m going with him.”

Bellamy is the first to react, and when he does, he explodes. “What the hell, O? You’ve only known him, for what, a week? Two?”

Octavia rolls her eyes, a familiar fighting look already shining defiantly in her eyes. “How did I know you were gonna say that? Look, Bell, it’s just for a few months. It’s not that big of a deal. And besides, it’s the opportunity of a lifetime.” She grins up at Lincoln, and he reaches over the bar to take her hand in his. “Lincoln’s company is even paying for the flight _and_ housing. And by the time we actually board the plane, I’ll have known him for months. _You_ think I should do it, right, Clarke?”

Octavia’s eyes meet hers, desperate for her to agree. Clarke thinks of how happy Octavia was when she saw Lincoln and nods slowly. “I say go for it.”

“Clarke!” Bellamy protests.

“C’mon, Bellamy. This _is_ an awesome opportunity. You can’t let her pass it up just because you have an inherent disapproval of anyone that she chooses to date.” Bellamy casts a desperate glance over at Raven, but she raises her hands in surrender.

“No way am I getting involved. But let’s be real. You know she’s gonna do it whether or not you approve.”

Octavia nods in agreement, and Bellamy slumps back on his stool. “It’s true, Bell. I’m 21; I can make my own choices.”

“I won’t hurt your sister,” Lincoln promises. Bellamy ignores him.

“Clarke?” Clarke whips around in her chair to see Lexa walking through the door. Two other girls are with her, one on each side.

“Lexa!”

“Damn,” Raven whistles. “You’ve got good taste, Griff.” Clarke blushes, but Lexa doesn’t seem to hear her.

“What are you doing here?”

“Lincoln invited us here.”

Clarke looks over at Lincoln. “As in _that_ Lincoln? The one dating Octavia?”

“Yeah,” Lexa answers. “We went to high school together, all three of us.”

“I wanted you guys to meet Octavia’s friends,” Lincoln explains.

Clarke raises from her seat and strides purposefully over towards Lexa, grinning at her.

“This is Clarke?” The girl to Lexa’s right speaks before Clarke has a chance to say something.

“Um, yeah. This is Clarke. Clarke, this is Anya, and this is Costia.”

Clarke offers her hand. Anya ignores it, but Costia accepts it warmly. She’s shorter than Clarke, with dark skin and hazel eyes. She’s pretty in a way that’s almost a side thought – the first thing you notice is her eyes, which are shockingly bright, then her smile, and the way that her dimples dent her cheeks, and finally the fact that she’s kind of gorgeous. Anya is pretty too, but in a more straightforward way. She’s the kind of pretty that’s almost scary, like she’d beat you up if you tried to compliment her. She’s also the kind of pretty that makes you think that she could punch you in the face and you’d wind up thanking her. Together, the three are almost intimidating in how attractive they are.

“Octavia!” Costia calls out, smiling at the brunette. “Hey! Do you know where Indra is?”

“Her shift doesn’t start for another half hour,” Octavia informs them. “She’s still teaching the intermediate class.”

Lincoln frowns at her. “You know Indra?”

“Yeah,” Octavia answers. “We met when I joined her self-defense class, and then she got a part-time job as a bouncer here.”

Clarke is still staring at Lexa as Anya and Costia go over to the bar to greet Octavia. “So, um, how are you?”

“Fine,” Lexa answers. “Thanks. You?”

“I’m great. Can I buy you a drink?”

Anya hides a laugh behind her hand, turning back for just a moment. Lexa fixes her with a steely glare. “I appreciate the offer, Clarke, but I’m not much of a drinker.”

Now Clarke’s determined to get Lexa a drink. She remembers how hungover Lexa was after just two beers, and she wants to see for herself just how much of a lightweight Lexa is. “C’mon, Lexa,” Anya cajoles. “When a pretty girl offers you a drink, you don’t say no.”

Clarke almost misses the subtle flash of emotion on Costia’s face as the smaller girl looks back towards Lexa. “Please?” she asks. “Just one. You guys can hang out with us.”

Lexa really can’t resist the way Clarke’s eyes combine with her plea. “Fine,” she sighs, “but just one.”

Clarke’s pout shifts into a grin at her words, and she grabs Lexa’s wrist and pulls her to the bar. “Octavia, one beer, please.” Octavia smirks and grabs a bottle of Clarke’s favorite brand, popping off the top and placing it on the bar top. Raven moves to give Lexa the stool next to Clarke.

“So everyone knows that I’m weak when it comes to alcohol,” Lexa says, rolling her eyes. Anya stifles another laugh. “What about you, Clarke?”

“Me?” Clarke can’t stop the confident smile that graces her face. “Oh, I’m easily the best drinker in the bar.”

“Hold up,” Raven says. “I’ll give you that you can hold your liquor. Like, trust me. I _know._ But I bet you that I could give you a run for your money. Wick taught me a thing or two about drinking.” Clarke recognizes the name Wick as being Raven’s boss at the garage.

“Oh, please. I could take you any day.”

Somehow their argument devolves into a drinking contest, and Lexa watches in a sort of reverent awe as Clarke knocks back a series of shots with no sign of slowing. Eventually Raven concedes defeat, and Clarke grins proudly. “Fuck yeah!” she crows. “I told you!” She does this drunken sort of victory dance in front of Raven before nearly toppling over and grabbing onto the bar for support.

Raven rolls her eyes. “Clarke, thass jus’ unfair. ‘m pretty sure y’don’t actually like… _consume_ the drinks. You jus’ absorb ‘em.” Clarke laughs loudly.

“Lexa, have you even touched your beer?” Anya asks.

“Screw you, Anya,” Lexa mutters back, but she takes a large gulp anyways. Clarke grins.

“’Tavia, why aren’t you drinking?”

Octavia rolls her eyes. “I work here, Clarke. It’s kinda frowned upon to get drunk on the job.” She hands Clarke another shot, and the blonde slams it back.

Raven moans. “ _How?_ ” This prompts Clarke to grin even harder. Even Bellamy has to smile a little at the sight of Clarke smiling like that, his lips twisting just barely up from the sour scowl he had been directing at Lincoln. Her grin is infectious.

Lexa has another gulp of her beer, and Octavia gives Costia and Anya each a drink – Costia’s is something fruity and pink, and Anya’s is spiked with vodka.

“No, I’m okay,” Costia protests, but Octavia shakes her head.

“Don’t worry about it. Clarke’ll probably pay for it, and if she doesn’t, then it’s on me.”

Costia looks skeptical, but her protests cease. Clarke leans in close to Lexa to whisper something, and a laugh bubbles up out of the brunette. Costia takes a drink.

The bar gradually fills up, and Indra arrives at some point. She’s a very serious looking woman who seems to be close to Anya, but she doesn’t say much to Clarke. Lincoln eventually leaves, claiming that he has to get up early the next day, and he kisses Octavia on the cheek before leaving, resulting in a fairly drunk Bellamy nearly lunging towards him.

“Bellamy Blake, I will kick you out of this fucking bar if you ever try to ‘ _protect_ ’ me by going at my boyfriend again.”

“You’re my little sister, Oct-”

“Don’t. You’re only three years older than me. That older brother thing is bullshit. I’m an adult, and you aren’t Mom.”

“Yeah, well, Mom’s not doing a great fucking job of taking care of us right now.”

“Don’t you dare fucking say that,” Octavia snarls. “Mom’s doing what she can. She’s why we’re here; she’s why we can afford college.” She leans over and shoves his shoulder. “You’re drunk, Bellamy. I’m taking you home after my shift so you can sleep this off.”

Lexa’s finally onto her second beer, and she’s become very quiet, her fingers twisting together, her eyes dark. Costia is at her side, and from Octavia’s observation, has almost made a drinking game out of the whole event, taking a large swallow of her drink every time Lexa glances up at Clarke. She’s on her third drink before Lincoln even leaves.

Clarke’s the life of the party, which is to be expected. She’s a giant flirt when she’s drunk, and almost kisses Raven at one point. Mostly though, she’s flirting shamelessly with Lexa, who doesn’t seem to know how to deal with it. Lexa’s cheeks are almost as pink as Costia’s drink.

“Okay, but like… I don’t understand how you can be this pretty.”

Okay, so maybe Clarke’s not the most subtle flirt when she’s drunk. It doesn’t seem to matter to Lexa, though, who mumbles something in response that’s almost inaudible. Clarke seems to hear it though, and she grins widely and bites down on her lower lip.

“Lexa,” Costia says, and her voice is strange. “We should get going. It’s almost midnight.”

“I’ll walk home later, Cos,” Lexa responds, and Costia’s face falls almost imperceptibly.

“Okay.”

Octavia wonders idly if Lexa knows that Costia likes her. “Costia, let me call you a taxi. Maybe you can take Raven and Bellamy home?”

Costia smiles. Raven’s fast asleep, with her head on the bar, and Bellamy is still glaring grumpily at his now-empty beer. “Sure. Can you write down their addresses so that I can tell the taxi driver?”

“Yeah, of course.” Octavia finds an index card and scribbles down the address to the loft. “Here. Just drop them off here, and Bellamy will take Raven inside.”

“Definitely.”

“Thank you so much,” Octavia says. She tugs some cash out of her pocket and hands it over to Costia. “Here, for the cab.”

“You don't have to.”

“You’re doing me a favor. The least I can do is pay you for taking these idiots home.”

She calls for a taxi, then grabs Clarke a water bottle as they wait. Clarke has this amazing ability to act perfectly sober as soon as she gets water into her. Octavia helps Bellamy carry Raven to the cab. Costia slides in first, then Bellamy, with Raven next to him with her head resting on his shoulder. “I’ll see you when I get home, Bell. Costia, my phone number is on that card with the address. You can call me whenever, okay?”

Costia thanks her again, and she really has to stop that, because Octavia’s not even doing anything all that nice. Costia shoots a glance back out at the bar, towards Lexa, and Octavia feels nothing but sympathy for her. She’s going to have to give Clarke a talk about not fucking around with Lexa if she’s not in it for real. Octavia’s fairly certain that a broken-hearted Lexa would be more painful to Costia than to Lexa herself.

She watches until the cab drives off, then heads back in. It's late, and her shift has ended, so she grabs Clarke’s attention. “Clarke, we should head home.”

Clarke finishes off the water bottle, shaking off the remnants of her drunkenness. It's kind of awe inspiring. “Okay.” Clarke smiles at Lexa, then turns back to Octavia. “I’m gonna get in the car.”

“Okay.” She heads outside to Octavia’s car, and Octavia sits down across from Lexa. Anya’s outside distracting Indra from her bouncer duties, so she can talk honestly to the other girl without anyone they know overhearing. “Lexa, what's wrong?”

“What do you mean?” Lexa’s words are slurred, and she’s only had the one beer. Octavia fights back a smile.

“I saw you on Friday, when you were out with your friends. You were ten times more talkative. What's wrong?”

Lexa’s eyes meet Octavia’s and quickly gloss over with unshed tears. It takes Octavia by surprise. “I-I have to go.”

Octavia just watches silently as Lexa runs out of the bar.

Lexa really hates being drunk. It's hard for her to remember how to hide her feelings when she’s like this, and she _knows_ that these feelings are ridiculous. It doesn't stop the tears that form in her eyes, and it doesn't stop her from fleeing the bar when Octavia asks the wrong question.

She doesn't know how long she runs, and once she stops, she’s not sure where she is. She pulls out her cell phone, flicking down to the C in her contacts. Tears obscure her vision as she presses the first contact under that letter, the way she always does.

It doesn't ring long before it's picked up. Before Costia can say anything, Lexa starts. “Cos, it's me, it's Lexa. I have to… I need to tell you… My dad’s coming. He called me and told me he’s coming, and I don't know what to fucking do, and I keep having these… the _flashbacks_ are coming back, Cos, and I don't know what to do. I'm just so fucking scared. And the nightmares are back, and I keep thinking that he’s hunting me down and he’s going to hurt you, Costia, and I can't protect you and I’m terrified of him but he’s going to be here next week and I can't hide anymore. There’s…” Lexa chokes over a sob. “There’s nowhere else for me to go.”

“Um,” says the voice on the other end. “Lexa? I think you have the wrong number.”

“Shit. Shit.” Lexa pulls back from her phone and makes out Clarke’s name on the screen. “Fuck.”

“Lexa, it's okay. Um, where are you?” Clarke’s voice is desperate, concerned.

“Fuck,” Lexa repeats quietly. “Um, I’m sorry. Fuck.” She hangs up, and Clarke’s heart just about stops.

“Octavia,” she says, leaning over. “Octavia, this is really important. Take me to get some coffee. Lexa’s…” She pauses. “I don't know where Lexa is. But she’s not okay. We need to find her.”


End file.
